What Kids Remember

A former student of mine found me on Facebook recently, and I am still beaming thinking about the wonderful young woman she has become.  Over the past few years, I've gotten the sad news that two of my former elementary students became pregnant in middle school (and I was their sex ed teacher), one student became a homeless/runaway drug addict at age 12, and two of my students essentially became orphans after their dad murdered their mom.  These updates deeply saddened me because they reminded me that it takes more than a village to raise a child, and some of these kids unfortunately have an unreasonable amount of challenges bombarding them in their early lives.  So when I heard from E that she is a junior in high school and concurrently enrolled in college classes at UT Pan American, I exploded with happiness.  Given she was great student back then and seemed to have a solid family life, this news just makes me so happy.

E also shared with me some memories of  her time as my student.  She didn't mention any specific skills or knowledge that she learned in fifth grade.  Instead, she talked about something I did that was not academic, and could have been considered to me a waste of valuable class time by some teachers.  I took portraits of all of the kids on the first day of school and used them throughout the year as I selected one each week as the Star.  They thought they were picked for being a good student/doing their homework/helping out, but in reality, I picked kids who I knew were going through tough times/had been recently picked on/failed to master a concept.  That Star had his or her portrait front and center all week, along with artwork and writing they did about his or her self the first week.  They got to help me with anything and everything, and they got to eat lunch with me on Friday.  And most importantly, all of the other students wrote something nice about the Star, and at the end of the week I gave them a compilation of things the other students had written about them.  In the world of fifth grade, it meant instant popularity...or at least respect.  Other kids wanted to emulate the Star so maybe they would be picked the following week.

E reminded me that teaching self-confidence and boosting others' self-esteem is not something only teachers should aim for with their students.  It's something we can all do as human beings.  It's something I can be doing at my job every day, at home with my husband and other family members, and with friends and people I meet during chance encounters.

I've been reflecting a lot this year about how my husband and I will be parents and teachers to our son, and reconnecting with E reminded me that confidence-building goes a long way with children.  I came across this blog entry that is common sense, but a good reminder.  I think it really applies to all loved ones, not just children.  :)

What Parents Need to Know (source)

That our children need more of us.  Our children don’t need Nintendos, computers, after school activities, ballet lessons, play groups and soccer practice nearly as much as they need US. They need fathers who sit and listen to their days, mothers who join in and make crafts with them, parents who take the time to read them stories and act like idiots with them. They need us to take walks with them and not mind the .1 mph pace of a toddler on a spring night. They deserve to help us make supper even though it takes twice as long and makes it twice as much work. They deserve to know that they’re a priority for us and that we truly love to be with them.